For the last three weeks I have been working long hours and attending classes all day. All for a certification called the TESOL. Once I am done I will be certified to teach English to non-native speakers. It is an interesting class and it is possible that, now that I am done with my classes for theology I can do this without fretting about the time that I am wasting. It makes me wonder when I attend these classes, I seem to be able to quite a few things and do them well. What then should I do long term?
Long term work would probably not be determined by just being good at the thing. The key there is the phase "long term." I do not think I can teach English long term. Sure, I could do it for some time, phases perhaps. But not something that I could dedicate my life to. Theology and Philosophy on the other hand have been things that have occupied my mind for the last 6 years at least. For the last three years I have studied them, under pressure, under deadlines. Even on days when I felt overwhelmed by the pressure, the thought did not occur to me that I don't want this. However, there is a problem. The way I want to write and think, the freedom I want, won't be something that will allow me to get paid.
And why should any one pay me for doing my thing? If it aligns with their thing or helps their thing then they may pay me. But just to do what I want? That wouldn't make sense.
That would make me think that my work like most of life is about negotiating. We negotiate meaning, and from that we negotiate terms of living. No one owns everything and no one can survive alone hence we must all negotiate our existence.
However, if God as depicted in the Bible, the "I am," exists. His existence would be without totally independent. At least that is what most theologians would say. Hence, he would be above our negotiated existence. But even God seeks glory and honor. Or does he? Does he seek or does he get glory and honor? Can a being who is totally independent in his existence truly ever desire anything? Even if we differentiate between want and need, the fact that the being wants something brings in another party in the equation, and hence a negotiation. However, if the being just gets is by virtue of his being the "I am," is the other party even free? Is God then just working this seeming but not real negotiation just to prevent man from being party to his destiny without understanding?
Long term work would probably not be determined by just being good at the thing. The key there is the phase "long term." I do not think I can teach English long term. Sure, I could do it for some time, phases perhaps. But not something that I could dedicate my life to. Theology and Philosophy on the other hand have been things that have occupied my mind for the last 6 years at least. For the last three years I have studied them, under pressure, under deadlines. Even on days when I felt overwhelmed by the pressure, the thought did not occur to me that I don't want this. However, there is a problem. The way I want to write and think, the freedom I want, won't be something that will allow me to get paid.
And why should any one pay me for doing my thing? If it aligns with their thing or helps their thing then they may pay me. But just to do what I want? That wouldn't make sense.
That would make me think that my work like most of life is about negotiating. We negotiate meaning, and from that we negotiate terms of living. No one owns everything and no one can survive alone hence we must all negotiate our existence.
However, if God as depicted in the Bible, the "I am," exists. His existence would be without totally independent. At least that is what most theologians would say. Hence, he would be above our negotiated existence. But even God seeks glory and honor. Or does he? Does he seek or does he get glory and honor? Can a being who is totally independent in his existence truly ever desire anything? Even if we differentiate between want and need, the fact that the being wants something brings in another party in the equation, and hence a negotiation. However, if the being just gets is by virtue of his being the "I am," is the other party even free? Is God then just working this seeming but not real negotiation just to prevent man from being party to his destiny without understanding?
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